Bonkers?

I must look completely insane but damn do I feel fucking awful right now. Is it normal to bounce back and forth between joyful, peaceful and shitty ALL the time, particularly when stopping drinking and/or grieving? Ughh. I wish I knew folks out here in the internet to verify if I am valid or bonkers or perhaps both. Maybe I will connect one day. Went to the bereavement class last night and I prefer to discuss it when I am feeling better. No desire to drink by the way.